Writing

Humor:

McSweeney’s:

This Woman Perfectly Illustrates What It’s Like to Have No Artistic Abilities Whatsoever

I’m the Quarantine Sitcom You’re Thinking of Writing, and I’m Begging You to Not

How to Find Your Correct Bra Size

Appropriate Moments to Respond with Lady Gaga’s Guttural Howl from the Song “Shallow”

More Wizard Facts We Wish J. K. Rowling Had Kept to Herself

It’s Me, Melania! I Am Right Here! Everything is Fine!

The Belladonna:

Susan Sontag’s Notes on “Summer Camp”

My Cover Letter for the Position of Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Best Friend

I Am the Dog in a Horror Movie and My Owners Aren’t Noticing All the Demons

The Daily Itinerary of Ben Affleck’s Phoenix Back Tattoo

I Am a Grown Woman and I Am Going to Marry This Pizza

Little Old Lady Comedy:

Realistic Acts of Self-Care

The Daily Drunk Mag:

I, Dr. Frankentstein, Would Like to Be Known for My Other Accomplishments

Funny-ish

Thoughts I Have About My Dog Every Single Day

All the Things Everyone Is Definitely Doing While You Sit on the Couch and Look at Instagram

Points in Case:

What Your Favorite Type of Apple Says About You

Slackjaw:

Better Hallmark Hanukkah Movies

So You Want to Unsubscribe


Flash/Micro Fiction:

A Postmodern Wife in Her Kitchen — Ruby Literary Magazine (nominated, Best American Short Stories)

Untethered — The Westchester Review

Floaters — Rejection Letters

New Thing Kisses — X-R-A-Y Lit Mag

Lily MonsterPeach Mag, Season 4

InfestationAfter the Pause, Vol. 7, Issue 1, pg. 19

Amy SacksFive on the Fifth, Vol. 4, Issue 9

Empty Bowl — TL;DR: NOPE 2


Short Fiction:

Watermelon Boyfriend, HaHa Lounge, ’94 — Identity Theory (nominated, Best of the Net)

Loomis, OKCorvus Review, Issue 10, pg. 154


Movie reviews:

The Blemish


Social media:

Twitter

@robinzlotnick Instagram – mostly pictures of my dog, Simon

@zlotspots Instagram – mostly pots I made or am in the process of making

@boom.toasted Instagram – mostly breakfast, lots of toast